10 July 2020 at Gorleston beach
I stand upon the shore
Content the endless sea
That kisses my toes
Is kissing your toes too
18 words written for Sammi’s Weekend Writing Challenge: Endless
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Particularly lovely poem today, Crispina.
Love the image you chose to go with.
It comes from a long ago relationship with a fella who was walking in Sarawak. I’d stand with my toes in the sea, and imagine him doing the same. And thus we were connected by the endless sea
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It’s true, the sea is the only thing I will abide kissing my toes. I also like the thinking on someone far away.
As I just remarked to Dale, it is based on an actual situation. I was in England, he was in Sarawak. But we dipped our toes in the continuous sea
Beautifully lines, Crispina! ❤
Thank you. Comes from an idea that once kept me company during a long separation
These are wonderful lines.
Having read rest of the comments I see it holds a personal meaning to you… a second read seems to have another layer of sweetness now. 😋
Yea. Those were happier days… when we were apart, than the end days when we were together. I don’t do live-in relationships at all well
I don’t do live-in relationships well either… even though I am a serial monogamist. You and i seem to have too much in common 😄
I’ve done serial monogamy… I consider that the natural state for humans. But… too independant, self-reliant, self-possessed, doesn’t sit well with others
And yea, I think we have much in common
I don’t think of it as being a “natural” state. I think whatever works between consenting adults is what is natural. I wish i could say it’s because i am too independent or self-reliant that i find it harder to make a go of it. But i suspect it’s something of a lesson that i am waiting to learn… 🙂
By natural I meant pre-homo sapiens as we know them
Wish you well in learning whatever the lesson. I’m still learning. I doubt we ever stop learning when it comes to relating to others, especially in a close relationship, cos everyone is different
Since you are one of those few people who, even when we don’t agree, keep an open mind to both listening to my arguments and put forth your own reasons for your beliefs, I would be remiss in not pointing out that sexual monogamy is rare in animal world and even in primates. In fact, the degree to which it’s observed in our world, it might very well be a uniquely human trait in many respects. However, how natural it is… i dont know. Religions in many ways tried to dictate what marriage is and should look like. We, as a society, are still uncomfortable in both accepting sex as something as natural as breathing and a way to maybe make a family that doesn’t restrict it’s membership to a heteronormative idea of a man and woman as the primary couple. Look how far behind we still are in accepting that sexuality and gender identity lies on a spectrum. So, i wouldn’t know where the norm lies.
But between us, I admit I have too possessive a streak to say that, “yes, i completely understand polyamory.” 😋
But my or anyone else’s lack of understanding can never invalidate it’s existence or it’s status as being an equally meaningful experience for those involved.
As you said, everyone’s different. And we all equally matter.
I disagree about the primates. Although the gibbon’s supposed monogamy springs from the male’s fierce defence of territory (i.e. the female hasn’t much hope of straying), yet both the orang and the chimp have been observed to form exclusive courtship couples which might last through several births.
However, above that are the gene-controlled instincts (and yes, I know it’s not exactly how it is, yet it’s how it works) whereby the male is driven to make the most of opportunity and the female to ensure her young are protected. And so we have the conflict of the sexes. For the female, serial monogamy works. For the male… I suspect but do not know, and I doubt most men do either, that there is a perpetual battle waged inside them: the advantages of fidelity versus a spread of the genes. I trust no man to be ‘faithful’ in flesh though the affections don’t stray. And myself? I get bored very quickly and I have to move on.
See, now your line of argument is both making a case for monogomy and against it. Monogamy, you say is helpful for females for the survival of their offsprings – something that’s not been found to be an issue since most primates live in large communities for the sole purpose of survival and better caring for the young ones where all females take part in child reasring regardless of who the mother is. So, no, monogamy doesn’t seem to be a necessity for survival of the offsprings. I don’t mean it doesn’t happen…only that it is rare among animal spieces. That’s why i said it might very well be a uniquely human trait, not monogamy itself but to ‘choose’ monogamy. As for men having some unconscious war waging in their heads to stay faithful – that i find condescending to men, in general. To think of them, and women, as solely goverend by their biological impulses. Because we are not fighting the same fight for survival our ancestors were, we can’t apply the same rubric here as one would for rest of the animal species. Does monogamy work for females… again… Not as some biological incentive because look at the world now than it was just a couple of centuries ago. Now more and more women are choosing to have children at a later age, focusing on their careers first. More are choosing to completely forego reproduction altogether, an autonomous choice that could never even be imagined as a ‘relevant choice’ a couple of centuries ago. Monogamy as an evolutionary reason for survival doesn’t make sense…not for the primates or the animal world at large. But neither does sex for pleasure. But it’s been well documented that many animal species partake in sex just for the fun of it. And of course, so do we.
So i think monogamy isn’t really a norm… it certainly does try to make itself appear sacred based on religious teachings all around the world. But here is the thing… and it’s definitely a feeling, not a critically informed thought: Those who subscribe to it, to them monogamy doesn’t feel like a negotiable thing. It doesn’t to me. I don’t think it does to anyone who says they are a serial monogamist. It feels as deeply encoded as, possibly, our very own identity. I can’t try polymory as if it were a never-tried-before sex position. So maybe, even if it’s not the norm in human relationships, it might very well be the only way to be for some of us. Just like sexuality.
I bow my head. I will not argue further. 🙂
You know what, so do i. I kept making assertions without adding any reference to back up my claims – a fault on my part. I was too tired (lazy) to add the links and i also muddied the argument by not defining exactly what i meant by monogamous relationships among primates. I am sorry for that.
Let’s just table the whole discussion and call it a truce? 😋🙃
Years upon years ago I did research the breeing behaviour of primates. But new knowledge comes along all the time, and there’s no way I still had those references. So I couldn’t back up what I was saying either.
But agood discussion for all of that. Thank you for being an interesting and interested opponent. I don’t often get the chance of that these days.
Feel the same. 🙂 ❤️
🙂 We have accord
This is short but very deep. It always fascinates me, how time and rain and the sky touches everyone and connects us. I love the photograph too.
It was great that I could use the photo, implulse-taken
It’s so soft and lovely, I can imagine a little breeze blowing over a coast, when you’ve to get stuck at home 🙂
Something like that, yea 🙂
The last line shows so much togetherness. Like knowing you’re looking at the same moon, the same stars.
And that, too, was how it was… 40 yrs ago
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