Masters of Unreality

A flower is a flower is a flower. (Okay, so some – mostly orchids – might mimic the bees.) But I’ve yet to find one that resembles a plate of mashed potatoes. But the fungi . . . they’re always trying to be something they’re not. Most often ‘kitchen rejects’. Take a look at this lot.

Fungi Cup cakes

A lemon cup-cake

Fungi sugared pancakes

Sugared pancakes

Fungus Yorkshire Pudding

My first attempt at Yorkshire puddings! (Oh, the embarrassment)

But not everything’s a reject . . .

Fungus Meringue topping

Have you ever had a lemon meringue pie? Well, here’s the topping.

Fungi Blackcurrant jam

And who spilled the blackberry jam?

Neither is everything sweet.

Fungus crab meat

I’d swear this is crab meat

As to this one . . .

Fungus sausage

Let’s just say sausage, and leave it at that

Then, of course, there are the fungi that try to be flowers . . .

Fungi flowers

Though these seem to be wilting, the season gone

Fungus exotic bloom

Ann this exotic bloom is in a garden long abandoned

And finally . . .

Tits Up Fungus

I’m saying nothing

Photos taken October-November 2017.

Apart from cropping, and tweaking a tad to improve the contrast, this is exactly how I found them.

About crispina kemp

Spinner of Asaric and Mythic tales
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16 Responses to Masters of Unreality

  1. Brian Bixby says:

    Pancakes sound good. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Joy Pixley says:

    Your commentary is hilarious! Comparing them to foods is so clever. But wow, what amazingly weird fungi! That blackberry jam one especially lives up to the post’s title. It’s amazing to me that you found all of those nearby, they seem so exotic!

    Liked by 1 person

    • crimsonprose says:

      All found within a 10 mile radius of Norwich. Though Damgate Carr (at nearly Acle) has countrywide renown for its fungi, I was too early in going, and never got back there. Maybe in the New Year, weather dependant.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Joy Pixley says:

        Wow, you really do live i Magical Mushroom Land!

        Liked by 1 person

      • crimsonprose says:

        Did yo miss-read that? I don’t live in the Urals, where the best magic mushrooms grow. Though, check back over the fungi posts and you will find that quintessential magic ‘shroom: the Fly Agaric. I found that growing quite close to where I lived before I moved to Yarmouth. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Joy Pixley says:

        I did misunderstand – I thought you were saying you lived near Norwich.

        Liked by 1 person

      • crimsonprose says:

        I do. Well, it’s the nearest city. It’s where I grew up. But then I moved to the coast. It’s only 20-or so miles east of the city, but an entirely different micro-climate. Different environment altogether. The coast hasn’t the trees I loved in my childhood. And though it’s a port on one of Norfolk’s three main rivers, it hasn’t sweet running rills and paddling streams, and all that they mean. And so most of my camera-accompanied walks require first a bus ride to Norwich, and then out from there. It;s not that Yarmouth offers nothing for my camera. I have posted photos of Breydon Water, which is a nature reserve. But I like it better inland. Gosh, I hardly ever go to the beach. No shells, no rocks, no interest. Great for kids and beach sports.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Joy Pixley says:

        I live four miles (as the crow flies) from the Pacific Ocean, and yet I hardly ever go there. I would much rather wander around the type of wildlands you describe!

        Liked by 1 person

      • crimsonprose says:

        The sea & the beach are great places for unwinding. But dead dreary for more than the odd visit! Though having said that, last September I was up on the North Norfolk coast for a week. But then there are shell-fish, and sea anemones and rock pools and cliffs in various states of collapse, and a hinterland that’s a different environment yet again. Ring the changes, the best of holidays.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Joy Pixley says:

        I do love to watch the waves. It’s the noisy people I could do without. And the blistering hot sun.

        Liked by 1 person

      • crimsonprose says:

        Ditto. Though in Yarmouth mostly the people stay on the central beach. In good weather I’ll get the bus out to Hemsby (perhaps 7-ish miles up-coast) and walk back along the beach. Hardly a person around till I hit Yarmouth. And always the possibility of seals in the sea for company. Incredible how quiet considering the entire coastline here is host to caravan sites and various holiday camp-type accommodation. But between them and the sea is a stretch of dunes with exceedingly prickly marram grasses and rather loose sand. Not good for walking in shoes, and murder for walking barefoot, so they all drive into Yarmouth, cos we have the most glorious, clean, white sand . . . and cafes, and chippies, hot dog stalls, burgers, bars, restaurants, penny arcades, a fun fair etc etc etc. Not forgetting a theatre. several night clubs, and a leisure centre. Which considering the size of Yarmouth, tucked in between marsh, river and sea, makes it somewhat crowded. Oh, forgot, we’ve also got a wind-farm, just visible out to sea.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Joy Pixley says:

        It sounds like a lovely walk! Here in CA, the beaches are gorgeous, but you usually can’t walk far in any direction without running into private property and/or cliffs.

        Liked by 1 person

      • crimsonprose says:

        Ah, but here all the beaches belong the Crown. Or, if you prefer, the Queen. And she very kindly allows us to walk upon them! Consequently, there are no private beaches. Which isn’t to say that some people’s properties don’t extend almost to the high water mark. But never beyond it.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Judy says:

    Well sugared pancakes looks a bit mouldy to me I am afraid but York shire pudding looks at least toasty,right? More like pita bread maybe!!

    Nice to see what breeds or blooms amongst the leaves!! I can remember friends and the line, there’s fungus among us….or something like that. Maybe it was in the Philippines where some got tropical icky skin things. I was immune I think due to hours spent in either salt water diving or swimming in chlorinated pools. Kills everythingl.

    Thanks for the earthy view of your woods.

    Liked by 1 person

    • crimsonprose says:

      It’s possible (likely) that the expression ‘the fungus amongst us’ originated with servicemen (reference to thrush-like fungal growths in hot sweaty places). More recently it has formed the refrain of a son (to be found on YouTube) in which it refers to Jesus. The theory goes that Jesus, like Mithras, was present in either/both the Liberty Cap mushroom (aka Magic Mushroom) and the Fly Agaric (the red cap, white spots, see my post ‘The Chap in the Red Cap), which forms the sacrament (take this, my body). It’s thought the Cathar heresy included this fungal feature. Certainly both types of fungi are found depicted on stained glass windows of relevant date in relevant region, Although I’ve also found the Liberty Cap depicted in the oldest stained glass windows in Norfolk. Hmm. One wonders, though perhaps not taken to be the sacrament, did monks seeking union with their god use these hallucinogens?


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