image from wikipedia
Foreign student: “This will and this shall confuses we. Please to explain when which we ought use.”
EFL teacher: “It is simple. Shall is used to denote a future intent.”
(A week later, in class)
EFL teacher: “Perhaps each can say something of how and why you came to England?”
EFL student: “I used to come to England the monies left to me in my grand-uncle’s Shall.”